I used to own a bike whilst living in a couple of my former abodes. This bike lasted for one house and one flat before I abandoned it round the back of the garages. Before we left the flat for good Nick's dad had a check round and found the bike. Clearly he was quite surprised that I should just dump a bike that looked perfectly fine. I said he could have it but did warn of the issues I had with the bike, namely that the gears and brakes were shot to pieces. Anyway, whilst living in 13 Lesbourne Road with this bike I did something rather silly.
What I did was take the bike in the living room and position it upright. I then lifted the back wheel off the floor and proceeded to turn the peddles with my hand, in order to see how fast I could make the wheel rotate. I wanted to zoom the wheel, whizz it if you will. Once going at a satisfactory pace I lowered the wheel back onto the floor. This caused a severe friction burn on the carpet and I was left standing there wondering why I had done this.
Due to the escalating price of petroleum gasoline, or Texas tea as I like to call it, I am considering purchasing a new bike. Presently I drive a very short distance to work and sometimes go back home at lunch and this is costing me somewhere in the region of £40 a month. Of course I do my little run abouts at the weekend, but to spend this amount of cold hard cash on le sauce for the conveyance sends me doolally.
Back to the carpets at 13 Lesbourne, the friction burn was not the only burn inflicted by myself. One day I decided to have some chicken nuggets, my method of cooking was to fry. When ready I took the frying pan off the hotplate and placed it down on the side board. I then got myself a plate and put this on the hotplate whilst I transferred the nuggets. Picking up the plate, I began carrying the nuggets through to the living room. I then had a sudden and very serious pain come searing down my fingers into my brain and my reaction was to throw the plate and run back into the kitchen. Immediately I ran the cold tap and placed my fingers under it.
When I returned to the plate I discovered that it had been so hot that it had melted itself to the floor. I had to literally peel it off the carpet. What happened was that a ring of plastic had melted into the carpet; the heat from the plate had caused a chemical reaction in the carpet and created plastic. Well, I can't tell you how annoyed I was.
Sheridans
Also whilst at Lezza Road I had a rather unpleasant incident with an Irish liquor called Sheridans. I had a Chinese take away on the night in question, and I had a bottle of this Sheridans stuff which I decided to have as well. This Sheridans had drawn my attention as it has two compartments, these mix together as you pour. This gimmick had drawn me in and I had to try it. Having drank the whole bottle on top of the Chinese I went to bed. In the middle of the night I woke up with the most excruciating stomach pain. I knew I had to go and try and use the toilet but the pain was so crippling that I had to crawl up the stairs to the bathroom. On my way back down the stairs the pain wasn't any better and any movement just made it worse, hence my crawling. I actually attempted to sleep on the stairs whilst curled up in a ball. In the morning the pain had gone but I felt jaded and I have never drunk Sheridans since.
Now, also whilst at 13 Lesbourne Road I melted a remote control. I had spilt a drink on it and in order to dry it out I put it in the oven and then forgot about it. When it was retrieved it was warped beyond recognition but it still worked, quite something.
Just a quick one, someone just asked me if I knew what a SSSA service agreement was. I said it was a Silly Snakes Service Agreement, you ring up for a service and a load of snakes come round.
